Saturday, November 28, 2009

I passed!

I passed the PPR! 279/300!!! If I did my math correctly, which it really wouldn't be a surprise if I didn't seeing as I am terrible at mathematics, that translates to 93%. So I did pretty well! Passing is great so regardless of my score, as long as it was above 80%, the required passing rate, I'm great!

Oh, PPR stands for Professional and Pedagogical Responsibilities. It's a tricky test because they have a "real world" answer and an "ideal world" answer on each question and you have to choose the latter because it's about what they want you to do. I'm not sure who "they" are but it's them, I know. :o)

Yay! Now I'm off to go spend the day with my sisters and parents, and of course, Mema. She isn't doing well so please keep her in your prayers. We are all fully aware that this is probably our last Thanksgiving with her. But she's surprised us in the past!

Because the first "Thanksgiving" (see previous post) was celebrated for three days and we are still celebrating, I will say again.....Happy Thanksgiving!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thanksgiving

Today in the United States we set aside a day to give thanks for the bounty we receive. I got to teach about Thanksgiving this week because we happen to be learning about the cultural geography of the Unites States and Canada. While there are many misconceptions about the first Thanksgiving, the central purpose of the day is still the same. I don't mean to tarnish anyone's ideas about the history, but I find that in knowing the truth, the day actually has more meaning.

My students were surprised to find that Thanksgiving did not become an actual holiday until 1863. They also were surprised to find out that the first thanksgiving was not in November as it was a harvest festival and harvest is in early fall. Also, Franklin Roosevelt tried to change Thanksgiving to boost the economy. It really didn't work because people were outraged that he would try to change a holiday, even though government and religious leaders do it all the time throughout history. After he tried to jack with everyone's perceptions, the holiday was given a permanent date on the calendar. It is also interesting to note that the pilgrim's first harvest festival in 1621 was not what they would consider to be a thanksgiving. It was after many hardships in the following years, seasons of drought, sickness, and death that they had a thanksgiving which they considered to be purely a religious day and which they actually called Thanksgiving. Harvest festivals were a tradition brought over from Europe. And while the indigenous population did share in the feasting which lasted three days, there was most likely little hand holding and singing around the camp fire among them and the pilgrims. They were still very divided due to race, religion, lifestyle, etc. Samoset and Squanto were helpful but whites only please!

Ok, so what is my point? I do have one, I promise. I know that modern historians tend to seem jaded or cynical but that is not my purpose. My point and the lesson I taught in school, is that no matter what your religion or lack thereof, thanksgiving is a day for you. No matter your race, creed, faction, religion, height, weight, hair color, eye color, your thoughts on Harry Potter, your political party, your belief on global warming (a sham by the way...just kidding), or whatever the case may be, you can still celebrate Thanksgiving. Because no matter who you are thanking, be it God, Allah, Buddha, the Sun God, the great Turtle on whose back the world was carried, the head of the GOP, or just sending out thanks to the universe, you can still be thankful. And we have so much to be thankful for.

An interesting side note, it was not my religious students who had trouble with me saying that Thanksgiving is not purely a religious holiday, it was the self proclaimed atheist. I thought it would be the other way around. But by the end of the class discussion, he said he saw my point. Who knows, maybe he's giving thanks, just being grateful that is, for all that he has in his life.

Which brings me to a tradition my late Aunt Jo used to have at her house every Thanksgiving. She kept a book from year to year in which everyone who was in attendance was expected to write what they were thankful for in the last year. My happiest Thanksgiving memories are of being at my Aunt Jo's. I cannot eat green bean casserole or a clover roll without thinking of her and her great big smile that lit up the room. Her laugh was not a delicate laugh, although she herself always seemed delicate. When she thought something was extremely funny, her laugh would start out silently and then only make noise when she was breathing in and her nose would wrinkle up all the way to her eyes. I miss her the most at Thanksgiving. Today I want to honor her memory by making my own list of what I am thankful for.

I am thankful, first and foremost, for my dear husband who I know was directed to my life by God. He has changed my life in so many wonderful ways. He is the greatest blessing I have ever received.

I am thankful for my family. I could not always say this in my life. There were really dark times of my childhood which prevented me from being thankful that I belonged to my family. But now, that has changed. Some people have changed, which began healing in my heart, and in another way, I have changed, allowing those of my family to finally know me, to know what has plagued my existence. There is no person in this world who could have caused these changes and I thank God for His movement in my life.

I am thankful for my family. Oh wait, I already said that. No, it wasn't a mistake. I am thankful that my family is alive. My father has been ill for almost 10 years and in the past has been on the brink of moving on. But today, he is healthy in spirit and in mind, and is probably better physically than he's been in 10 years. For those of you who have healthy parents, be thankful. In so many ways, I lost my father 10 years ago. But in another way, in the past year, I have gotten a father I never had. God works in mysterious ways. For this, I am thankful.

I am thankful for life. This may sound cliche but it is true. I have had times in my life where I did not want to be alive or times when I felt I wasn't alive. So for me, life itself is a blessing. And perhaps even greater than the blessing of life itself, I am thankful that I know that I am alive and that I want to be alive. Praise God.

I am thankful for the bounty it which I live. Steven and I are not rich in any worldly manner. In fact, without the help of my mother over the past year, we would probably be homeless. Even though we never really have money, we have never gone hungry, we have always been warm or cool when necessary, we have never gone barefoot, we have never gone without clothing, and when we have been ill, we have had medical care. So thinking in those terms, we are rich. I am thankful to my mother, and to God who put the love and inspiration into her heart.

I am thankful that I am about to graduate! This really should tie into the paragraph above because the reason we never have money is that I have been a professional student for what seems like an eternity. I have written before that my college years have been difficult and they have been. But now they are coming to an end and I couldn't be more grateful. Graduation will be the closing of a very tumultuous chapter of my life but also a time of change which was definitely needed. So I could also say here, thank you Lord for trials and tribulations because the valleys make the mountain tops so much greater!

I pray that everyone has a happy day regardless of where you are and who you are thanking. Enjoy your turkey, be it fried, roasted, stuffed with a duck stuffed with a chicken, or however you may or may not eat it. In everything, let us all be thankful.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Blogging absence

It has been quite some time since I wrote last. My absence is due to multiple reasons. Firstly, student teaching has been consumed most of my time. During my first placement the actual teaching was much easier but I had to complete what is called the Teacher Work Sample which was horrific. In short, it was a 54 page paper proving I understand the method of teaching. I finished that and scored a 3 which is the highest can be scored and it was very difficult so I am not ashamed to say I am proud of myself. It was a lot of work that I would never, ever want to have to do again and I feel is quite an accomplishment.

Although I didn't have to worry about the TWS in my second placement of student teaching, the placement itself has been quite a bit more trying. I love the students and the courses I am teaching but I don't fit in well with the grown-ups. We get along but we have very different teaching methods and ideas. I have learned a great deal, specifically that where you teach is very important because personality is a factor. It has been a good learning experience, just trying in a way that I did not expect. Thankfully, I have only have 9 more school days before I am done!!!! And only 28 days until graduation!

When I put up that countdown on my blog wall a year ago, it seemed like the number would never go down. And now, I can't believe I'm actually almost done! It is wonderful, exciting, and scary all at the same time. Being a December graduate is already a disadvantage to finding a teaching position but even more than that, the economy is definitely impacting the availability of jobs. As of last week, there were no positions available in the districts around where we live. But, if I have learned anything, it is to remember that God is in control and He will provide.

Another reason I have not posted in so long is that I was really sick for several weeks. I developed a bad kidney infection and had to go through 3 rounds of antibiotics before it healed. And as if that were not enough, immediately following, I got the flu. And I even had the flu shot this year! I ran fever for 6 solid days and was miserable. I feel for anyone who is suffering with the flu because there is nothing that seems to bring comfort. If you lay down, you cough. If the fan is on, you cough. If the fan is off, you sweat. But even worse than having the flu was having to miss visiting some family in the Dallas area. I was really looking forward to seeing them but could not because I felt so terribly, and would not because I didn't want to get them sick. Hopefully we will all be able to visit soon.

This has been a trying semester, but then again, I don't remember when I've had an easy semester. I don't think that it exists. Other than sickness and regular student teaching duties, I have also been dealing with personal, family issues. These issues continue to arise in my life and I used to long for days when I would no longer be plagued with such problems but I have come to accept that they are part of my life. They are part of who I am whether I like it or not. But even though I know I will always have to live with what has happened, I pray that eventually life will not come to a screeching halt whenever someone decides they need to react in one way or another. I also hope that some day I can serve a purpose in the lives of those who have been made to suffer in the same way as myself. In addition, perhaps someday I will be able to talk freely about myself without feeling judged or uncomfortable. I know there is no day but today, but sometimes there are things too painful to think on in the moment. No matter what the case, God will never leave us comfortless. In that promise I will build my foundation.